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Excuse me for a second. My left temple has an appointment with a powerdrill.

Jared is face palming into the controller and shaking his head as he plays Hydlide.

Hydlide
Hydlide
Upload Date August 17th 2012
Series ProReview


Link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxskwhpbLts
Score A bee sting out of ten

1/10


Synopsis[]

Jared hates Hydlide. Jared's brother owned Hydlide and hid it from Jared so he couldn't play it, but Jared found it and realized the game sucked even then.

The theme song sounds like the Indiana Jones theme and loops every fifteen seconds and is almost the only song you hear for the entire game. There is basically no plot. There's a dragon and a princess, and the princess explodes into fairies.

The hero's name is Jim. Jared compares Hydlide to the superior Legend of Zelda. Jared explains that the player runs into enemies and hope Jim wins. It makes no sense, and there's no skill involved. One of the fairies is right at the beginning of the game, randomly placed in one of the trees. But if you choose the wrong one, BEEEEEEEEEES. Jim the Knight, killed by bees. The player has to grind on slimes in order to grind a lot of experience -and die a lot. The only way to heal is to stand perfectly still.

Jared grinds on bats (or Stirges - stolen from Dungeons and Dragons) to beat the vampire boss. The saving system makes no sense, as the game doesn't save to the cartridge like Zelda does. Jared goes for the password instead, and finds it is really long. 

Jared discusses Magic items, and only one of them is useful (the one that makes enemies run away). The others kill the enemies, but don't give experience, and magic attacks do nothing to enemies that the player would want to use magic attacks on.

Even the trees are even trying to kill Jared! F-ck you nature. The last fairy is protected by wizards who need to be killed at the same time with the Wave spell, but that spell only works left or right, and the area you find the wizards in is very narrow. Jared explains more annoying mechanics of the game. Jared gets a Medicine item, which the player needs to beat the final boss because it's just not possible otherwise.

Beating the final boss is pure luck, and the only way to defeat it is to be in defend mode! It took 8 or 9 attempts for Jared to beat it. The ending is very disappointing.

Hydlide is super short, and is one of the most painful games Jared has ever played. The grinding makes the game not fun to play and the music is irritating.

Trivia[]

  • This video was featured in his 5 Yeariversary!! A Look Back video.
  • Even though it is claimed to be a clone of The Legend of Zelda, Hydlide was released two years before the The Legend of Zelda.
  • This episode spawned two of Jared's running gags. "BEEEEEES" and "F-ck you Nature".
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